Creative living takes bravery. By its very nature, it is unpredictable. When you follow your inspirations, when you go on the adventure of creating, chaos and risk are a part of the package. They can show up in many ways, big and small, from the mess generated when you create your art to the flurry of change generated when you create your life.
I’m in the flurry.
In December, my husband asked me if I would like my dream desk for my birthday. I was beyond thrilled at the prospect but I hesitated. This new, big, beautiful desk would be absolutely ideal but it would disrupt my studio. Everything would have to shift. My shoulders slumped at the work, the mess, the chaos. I heard myself saying, “Hmm… I’ve got everything set up so it works and I’m really busy so I don’t know.”
And in that moment, I saw a pattern. I saw how much easier it is to just let things be – even when something wonderful was being offered right here and now!
Was that the way I wanted to live my life, protecting the status quo? Afraid to do the work of saying yes to the awesome? Or would I embrace the whole idea of creative living, being willing to disrupt (even destroy!) what is for what might be?
I said yes.
And the chaos is even more than I imagined. As soon as we removed the old desk, I could see that we should paint. Again, I hesitated. It was more work. It would take more time, which meant a longer period of chaos. Plus, I love, love, love the current colour. What if I chose one that I didn’t like as well? What if the change made it worse, not better?
And I saw that pattern once again. Was I willing to risk what was in order to explore what might be?
I’m picking up paint chips today.
Is “holding onto what is” impeding your creative life?
Note: I shared this story with my newsletter subscribers and then realized it’s an important step in the refresh story and needed to share it here too.
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I’m feeling exactly the same way!! Late last fall my husband and I decided that I would ‘take over’ our living room area for my studio because I need much more space than I currently have. While in theory it sounded like a great idea but I found reason after reason as to why it wasn’t….we have to move all the living room into the family room…the gym has to move…the library isn’t quite right…there’s not enough wall space..blah, blah, blah. So nothing happened until after Christmas when my very perceptive husband casually remarked that I didn’t feel worthy of using the living room space as my studio.
Light bulb!! He hit it directly on the nose. My old pattern was rearing it’s ugly head. While I am still hesitant to move into the living room at least now I know why. And in the mean time – until I work it all out in my head/heart I’m making the most of my current studio by purging and preparing!!
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