What Do You Know for Sure?

In this beautiful community of creative independent spirits one of the deepest yearnings I hear is the longing to simply be who we are, to build a life based on our true selves and to express that self in all that we do. To my mind, this is our life purpose: to be who we are. It’s the most natural thing in the world and the most challenging. So how do we start?

It all begins with knowing who you are.  Knowing your favourite colour or meal or outfit is not a trivial thing at all. Knowing that you love mornings and swimming and mangoes is part of the unique beauty of you. Knowing you’ve got a bad temper and allergies and a history of bad breakups is a part of that beauty too. Authenticity starts with knowing you, all of you.

An easy way to start is with the facts. It’s amazing how many things you actually know about yourself. Here’s the start of my list:

• I live in Toronto.
• I’m married.
• I’m 5’4″.
• I’m the eldest of 4 kids.
• I have an MA in theatre.
• I wear corrective lenses.

Add some likes and dislikes. Knowing your preferences is a powerful way to be grounded in your choices. (By the way, developing a practice of creating dreamboards is a great way to get in touch with your preferences. That’s how I discovered my love of that delicious blue/grey/purple colour!) You can start with some very specific things and also have some more general thoughts.

• I like dark coffee.
• I adore my red couch.
• I love popcorn and rasperries. Though not together.
• I do not like shellfish. At all.
• I love studio spaces: white walls, wood floors and room to move.

If you started listing your Absolute No‘s along with me last week, you can add them to the list of things you know for sure.

• I will not stay up all night to get work done.
• I will say no to opportunities, no matter how good, that make me feel rushed and ill-prepared.

Another powerful thing to know about yourself is your values and by that I literally mean what you value, what you think is important. Identifying values is one of the first things I do with my coaching clients. Some of my values are:

• Freedom
• Love
• Adventure
• Inclusiveness
• Magic

And what about personality traits? What do you really know about yourself? What have people always said about you? (Before you include it on your list, make sure you think it’s true) What may be true that you don’t share readily? What are your more prickly qualities?

• I am both sunny & enthusiastic and serious & driven.
• I am a pitbull. I don’t like to let go of a challenge until I’ve got it sorted.
• I am fiercely independent.
• I am emotionally brave.

If you dream of creating an authentic life, of expressing your true self, the best first step is getting to know exactly who that is. Spend some time with these questions and a journal. Create your own “What I know for sure” list. If you post about it, be sure to share your link. Another big step is sharing what you know about who you are.

Because I believe so deeply that the root of our purpose is to be found in this self-discovery, I created an at-home workshop to help. If you feel that some structure and a creative process would enhance your self-discovery, please check out Soul Reflections. I designed it for you.

Tagged as: authenticity, self-knowledge

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